in your life there's a street or a place that pops up for strange reasons. i've been thinking lately, where's this blog thing going to next. when you get into that situation , it's sometimes better to have a spell or do other things. get your mind off the last thing, which i could have kept going on , but it was getting long. then out of some place way back yonder came branch ave.
16april2014
branch ave, figtree, new south wales to be precise. a street at which before 10th of october 1971, i had never been on or had ever heard of, to my knowledge at that time. that was all about to change, even the date, became a curse. as i try and remember that day, i was 12 years old , 13 in a few days, i always wanted to be a teenager. in the 50's and 60's, teenagers were the in crowd, all the fun stuff , like rock 'n rock, fads and all that type of shit, was centred all at teenagers, so 13 was a very big time for young people. if you've read about some early life stuff in other blogs, i might even have mentioned the episode earlier, i don't look back much, even if i am now. the story of branch ave is not one i reflect on much. a bit like feet on seat.
20april2014
the difference here is it's more deeper and painful than the seat on feet thing. for me to go back there it's pretty heavy. remembering stuff , you know, just want to move on, but it's all part of what makes one. as i remember , my home life had been pretty much shit to say the least , it had been for a long time, since about 1966. when i say home life, i mean a safe home. i don't really wanna get into the home stuff all so much, but that day i wasn't in no hurry to get home or so called. it was a sunday , i was at some new friends place. new meaning a new school , not the primary school but 1st form . 10 months into it. you know them days were somewhat different, i know it's cliche. anyways, a few classmates meet at one place as we said we would, something came up , and the guy had to go out with his parents somewhere, swimming or something. he said i should visit this other guy who lived in branch ave.
21april2014
he said i should ride his bike up , i thought that was a good idea. i never had my own bike, i used to ride my sisters girls bike everywhere and get hassled, she never rode it. he had one of those mustang type bikes, which i always wanted. the bike was in neglected condition, no brakes and loose handle bars that went forwards and were hard to pull back . i used my thong on the wheel as a brake, thong being a japanese safety boot, you know flipperty flop, flip flop. you know they call them jandles in new zealand. it worked okay if you going not that fast. my sisters bike had the back pedal brake. from where the guy whose bike it was, it was flat down figtree way, to the other guys place was figtree heights, pretty hilly. i didn't know up there that well. i made it to the guys place, i went the long way round. it all seems a bit silly, now. i don't know what made young guys think like they do, i still see it nowadays. it's all a bit corny, lonely, sad really. then i think does it change or you, just something. i think them computer type games fuck their heads, i know guys now 30 somethings, just played games all through their 20s, fuck that. anyways, he had a rumpus room and a mini golf setup in the back yard, a couple of baked bean tins in the ground for holes. we just played a few games and things as i remember.
this bike is similar to his bike
24april2014
you know that bike is really similar, take away the brakes , loosen the handle bars, leave in the weather for 3 months and you're close. i suppose you figured out, i crashed the bike. on the 11th of october , i woke up stuck to the bed sheets, wanting to have a piss. i laid there thinking where was i. i remembered nothing, when i say nothing i really mean nothing. now , bits come back. a nurse came and said, your awake, she had to put drops in my eyes. she helped me get loose from the sheets, my wounds had wept and dried and stuck to the sheets. it's amazing how i remember that shit after all them years. i can remember going for a leak, and seeing some poor dude in the mirror. then realizing it was me. half my face was gravel rash, you couldn't see my eye. after that i just went back to bed and crashed out.
27april2014
a couple of nurses came in ,told me how i ended up there, they said i might be in the news, thank fuck it wasn't. i'm a private person even then. they done the sheet change, eye ball drops and whatever else. i couldn't remember jack shit, but i learnt a skill of remembering out of that. that's how i can remember it now. i was in intensive care with all these very sick and or dying people around me, it was a modern hospital, low tech though, it seemed to be more caring than these days. i just crashed out. they said the head nurse and doctor would visit and determine my situation.
28april2014
i can't say how long i was in intensive care . but i was moved to the children's part or ward whatever. as i remember there was 4 beds and 3 pountces , one i remember had tonsillitis removal, can't remember the others. they had nothing on me, i think they just looked at me. even then i was from a different place. the thing that hurts me most, was waking up on my birthday, a couple of nurses came and gave birthday kisses and things, that was ok. but i was now thirteen , the teenager. i looked for some presents, beside the bed was some kmart el cheapo slippers, that was it. i never wore slippers for a long time, i never even wore pajamas . but there was no one. when i look back now at that time, that was low, maybe better dead. i think i was pretty brave then.
29april2014
this is turning into more of me than branch ave. it's all relative. them other guys had visits from family and friends, they'd pull the curtain across , poor old rob, that's me by the way. just when i was feeling real down, a familiar head pops in and looks around. it was grandad, then he turned and walked away. i jumped out of bed and shouted out, grandad. he turned around and walked back, he didn't know it was me. he just thought, look at that poor bastard. i read recently about keith richards saying something about grand fathers beening important, i would agree with that. after that i got a few visits from classmates and a few rellys, no parents though, they reckon i didn't want to see them, maybe yes and no, that was always what they say. lying in bed was boring. i found a new activity, tying knots in the pyjama chord. i must of tyed twenty or so knots. the nurses had been giving me these pills, all sorts ,even these red things. all of a sudden i had to go. i went to the toilet , bloody kiddies things all over the place, tiles and such. there was a nurse giving a kid a bath next to the loo, i had to go, then the bloody knots became an obstacle, trying to undo. i was swearing , saying things like fucking shit, the nurse got offended . i didn't manage to untie the knots.
30april2014
your right , i'd rather fuck some bird then write this shit. but , i'd forget the fuck and want another. this shit is planted firmly in thy dna and is the source of dust. i've had a few wines tonight , even so, this shit don't go away. i'm glad some fuckers interested in my shit. i know who you are. germany and usa, but like everything that changes there there's an error of judgement . at least i've got some kind of audience.
"30july 2016"
i think i was pissed on wine there, i half know what i was on about. i know i was pretty upset going through remembering that time. even now it still upsets me. i was gonna delete or fix it , but i don't know what to fix. the usa and germany bit is about people always reading my blog and that's it, just snoops, suppose it's part of it. i think what i meant there, was from dust we are made and from dust we return. as for fuck it is not, but then maybe it is.
4may2014
as days went on i became rowdy . i'd been there for a bit , they called for the old boy to pick me up, that was it for the hospital. now i had to deal with all the other shit. stuff like people in general , my face was still half a scab, my eye was getting better. i forgot to say it was very blood shot in there. i found out later i had concussion, a fractured skull and stitches in my eyebrow, not to mention gravel rash on the arms. i had good mending skin , so i got better fairly quick. i had to see the doctor to take the stitches out of my eyebrow. he said he thought there was 4 but could only see 3. he was right there was 4 , i got the other one out some weeks later. so i was on the mend , but what happened.
5may2014
time is a great healer, like they say. after months of trying to figure out what happened, things start coming back. before i go on with this, while i was away ,motor bikes were the in thing. the guy who owned the push bike i crashed got a motor bike, something like a honda 100cc, sort of trail bike thing. there was a track near the school. so it was decided to go there. this other guy, a bit older than us would double me there. i was not long back to normality . the prick rode like a fuckwit down this hill, dirt track, about 120kmph . i just freaked out with a flashback, i handled it, though. if something would of happened i would have been fucked. after that i wasn't real interested in that shit, i'd just hang and watch. i think i just got sick of them ,ie, i got this ,ie, i can do this fucking shit. on remembering what happened. after awhile the guy who lived in branch ave, his family were all going out, so i had to go. they suggested i go the other way , it was quicker. i remember when i rode down their driveway , i nearly got bowled by a car.
6may2014
there's a small hill and sort of bend, i can't remember riding up there. after the bend it's all downhill. i can remember trying to slow down with the thong and flying past this dead end street, which i should of just crashed there. the thong wasn't happening , the handle bars went forward , couldn't pull them back. i just thought , i'd been in hairier situations. this wasn't to be . doing about 50mph head first onto the rough blue metal road near the bottom. i can just remember getting up and walking to the side of the road and collapsing. not long after, i was drifting in and out. i remember peoples feet and voices talking shit, like ambulance and, is he type stuff, that's about it. the branch ave guy's family weren't long on the scene apparently, he said he thought i was dead. the ambulance arrived . his mother traveled in the ambulance with me. i remember this, for some reason maybe pain or delirium, i grabbed her hair and wouldn't let go. the ambulance bloke just punched me out, i can't remember anything after that.
8may2014
on reflecting and thinking about that last bit. i think i just gave up and cried. and can sort of remember being on some kind of xray machine table , and people going he's a mess. that's about it for that episode. this whole thing wouldn't have even been written about, if not for, in 1993 , i got this job , getting bands for this newly opened club. in order to get the bands , i had to get a phone. i don't think the mobile thing was that happening then. anyways, every now and again i'd get these calls , saying james, james gauge. i 'd just go wrong number.
9may2014
this used to happen every once and a while. i must have got his old number. i don't know if this sort of thing means anything. when i first got a phone in 1983, i got this woman's old number, this familiar voice asks is la la there. i thought i know that voice . i knew the womans daughter. the bloke was rooting her mother. bazaar. getting back to this james gauge thing. it went on for years , right up until i got the phone disconnected . different people would ring asking for james. then one day someone said james , james gauge , 6 branch ave figtree. at first i didn't think nothing, just this bloody james gauge fellow should tell his friends his new phone number. then i thought branch ave, that's where i had that crash that time. if it happened once for a short period of time, i 'd put it off as coincidence , but these calls went on for years. i was nearly tempted to ask who was this james. it was always the same just james nothing else, i'd say sorry wrong number. it wasn't every day. i reckon i had that phone number for 12 or so years , and i'd get them calls right up till the end. one day i decided to walk to branch ave, and see where this number 6 was. it was right where i hit the road. i just thought that's sort of weird. as for the people involved in 1971, i seen the guy whose bike it was about a year or so, he had a hip replacement at 54, that blew me out. he was the surfie sking type, very ,not sporty but, outdoory . the guys whose mother was in the ambulance with me, she died about a year ago, R.i.P. he was also a surfy and good at sport, he got trapped in the heroin thing in the 80s, thats the last i saw of him. i thought he might of died, but it didn't say deceased in the paper for his mothers obituary thingy, so he must still be alive somewhere, probably all fucked up.
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